Lohan and Neiers: Someone Messed Up The Jail Seating Chart
July 22nd, 2010
According to Vanity Fair, Lindsay Lohan’s jail cell is located next to, or very close to, Alexis Neiers’s cell. You may know Alexis Neiers as one of the stars of E!’s Pretty Wild, the worst/best example of where reality TV has taken us (to an awful place of celebrating crazy people with absolutely no moral compass or brains). The show is a terrible train wreck not fit for airplane watching. Except that I just watched it on an airplane. Anyway, Alexis’ other claim to fame, for which she is in jail, is being part of the Bling Ring</strong, the kids who burgled celebrity’s homes, including Lohan’s. Neiers was actually accused of wearing Lohan’s jewels.
Pretty Awwwwwwwkward!
So either a) They’ll avoid each other in the jail hallway and not sit at the same table at jail lunch
or b) There will be a good old fashioned jail recess fight. I’m also not ruling out the possibility that they become jail best friends. In fact, I’m sort of leaning towards that. Maybe post jail recess fight. After they get all of the tension out, I can see them finding religion together and then helping the other write the other’s memoirs. Here is a dramatic recreation of Lohan and Neiers hanging out:
Besides playing checkers, they could also help the other one find the person who actually committed the crime that they are accused of. Because, didn’t you know, everyone in there is innocent. I’m going to send Lohan a poster of Robert Pattinson and Alexis a rock hammer. Hopefully they know what to do with them.
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