American Idol: Dallass Does Debbie Right Back!
January 31st, 2010
Hello again everybody! My name is J-Mo, and I’ve just breezed in for a few minutes to chat with you all and make a confession. Like many Americans, I made sure to sit down and pay attention to the President’s State Of The Union Address last night. In fact, I took copious notes on it. KIDDING, I slept through the whole thing! So I’m sure you can imagine my extreme annoyance when I awakened to discover we were going to have to listen to another fifteen minutes of boring-ass blathering in order to allow the governor of Virginia a chance to give the “Republican response”. Like this was debate class back in high school. Which I also slept through. Anyhow, it’s not that I don’t care about what’s going on in our country today, or what our leaders are going to lie to us about next plan to do about it, it’s just that the whole situation scares the bejeebleyfuck out of me and I prefer to escape into the readily available Fantasyworld™ on Fox…
…in which someone actually wants to see Simon Cowell in a wet T-shirt…
Yes, this Season 9 episode of American Idol is back in Dallas, Texas for the third time to audition thousands of mentally ill wackadoodies hopeful singers that just want their chance to… show everyone how talented of a singer they are? Not hardly! These wannabe famewhores are either looking for an opportunity to get on TV by being stupidly laughable, or they’re ready to bust out with a Tale Of Woe™ that would make Old Testament Job look at them and say, “Daaaamn dude, you win!” Are you ready to go back to Titanic, ‘Gasmii? ‘Cuz I suspect this show has recently struck an iceberg called “The X-Factor” and is sinking fast, so let’s take a running jump over that looming shark, shall we?
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