Best Television Shows

Archive for August, 2010

A friend of mine sent me this pic of Mantrap Nails & Hair, a real salon in L.A. and not a subtle Simpsons background joke:

Pardon my East Coast self for being easily impressed by well-named salons, but I am easily impressed by the name of this salon. Can someone in L.A. tell me if they have awesome jingles with a Pointer Sisters imitator singing “How do you trap your man? MAN-TRAP!” And if not, can someone put me in touch with a good West Coast commercial lyricist agent?

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Notice anything strange about the celebrities at the 62nd Annual Emmy Awards? We did. Everyone looked like they laid in a tanning bed for 48 hours prior to showtime. This was easily the tannest Emmys ever. To celebrate those destined for champagne wishes and melanoma dreams, we’ve put together the 21 Tannest People at the Emmys. We blame/thank Jersey Shore in advance:

21.  David Strathairn

20. Brooke Burke

19. Kate Gosselin

18. Alexander Skarsgard

17. Tom Hanks

16. Claire Danes

15. Jane Krakowski

14. George Clooney

13. Giuliana Rancic

12. Toni Collette

11. Jewel

10. Rob Riggle

9. Edie Falco

8. Julia Louis-Dreyfus

7. Olivia Munn

6. Heidi Klum

5. Anna Paquin

4. Jimmy Fallon

3. Stephen Moyer

2. Al Pacino

1. Scott Bakula

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Have you ever seen Yoko Ono have a 3 minute long orgasm? Unless you’re the ghost of John Lennon, the answer should probably be “Ono.” But thanks to the magic of modern art, the internet, and the mushroom that lives where Yoko Ono’s brain once stood, now we can all experience how Yoko responds to the greatest of life’s pleasures.

The official name of this video is “VOICE PIECE FOR SOPRANO & WISH TREE at MoMA,” but we prefer to call it “Thing That Will Haunt You to the Grave.”

Big thanks to former BWE producers Nelson and Caissie for discovering this genius.

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It’s like National Waffle Day over here, only it’s National I Talk About Funny Album Covers Day! First: Cats. Now: Tacos. Behold, someone (Album Tacos) put tacos on iconic album covers. As opposed to the cats, these are doctored. Doctored to deliciousness! Here are some good ones, check out the rest here.

Via Gorilla Mask

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ro·mance (rō-ˈman(t)s, rə-; ˈrō-ˌ)

n.

1: A love affair.

2: Ardent emotional attachment or involvement between people; love.

3:

Nothing more romantic than finding out your boyfriend is proposing to you at the exact same time as readers refreshing Radar Online looking for news about additonal people Mel Gibson has told to blow him before a violent thing occurs.

I think she’ll say yes.

(via Dlisted)

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Cats: People love them. Even if you don’t love cats necessarily in the flesh (fur) (ugh), there’s something about a cat that’s funny. Or pleasing. Listen, I don’t effing know. What I do know is that I have noticed many an indie rockin’ band use cats on their album covers as of late. So I decided to compile a list of said album covers and then, wouldn’t you know, someone beat me to it. Well played, musicforants.com. Your Zoolander reference is almost as obscure as the list itself. So, the examples I thought of on my own are The Klaxons: Surfing the Void

Best Coast: Crazy For You

and Wavves: King of the Beach

And then someone far better at compiling cat indie album art lists swooped in and nailed it. Check out the full list here

Update: My friend Drew pointed out this creepy gem. Bonnie Prince Billy: More Revery

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Here’s Claire Danes announcing David Strathairn’s name during the Emmys last night in a voice that you aren’t expecting. I rewound this clip many, many times. It just kept getting better:

They were both in Temple Grandin together, so I assume it’s an oddly-timed homage to that, but at no point in the movie do I recall the autistic title character saying “David Stratherrrrrrnnnnn!” Maybe it’s on the DVD Extras, if HBO has those.

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If there is one sit-com that has dominated this past year in television, it is hands down Modern Family. The cast is incredible, hilarious, amazing (specifically, Manny), and their win for Best Comedy at the 62nd Annual Emmys last night was overly deserved.

But not even for the season. No, their win last night could be best summed up in the 2 minute sketch they provided the show with, where a “television exec” tries to make the show better. And, in the process, somehow fold George Clooney into the show.

If you missed the Emmys last night, be sure to catch this sketch. Sofia Vergara is totally the Penelope Cruz of the small screen, in that they are both Spanish, beautiful and hilarious. If you’re on Sunset Boulevard, keep your eyes peeled, because she’s probably jogging down it naked at the moment.

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Metro UK, purveyor of my most coveted news items, reports this:

Police spokesman Reto Casanova (his actual name) said: ‘We can’t get rid of prostitution, so have to learn how to control it.’

A sex box. A box for sex. I. Just. Can’t. There are too many things. I guess what springs to mind is that it would be a really confusing pick up line: “I’d like to drive into your sex box. Is your sex box close? Because I’d like to have sex in your box. NO. Not a euphemism.”

I hope there aren’t other boxes for other purposes. Like children’s play date boxes. Things could get tricky.

I think this will be really good publicity for my band, Sexx Boxx. Check us out on MySpace. (Lies).

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On the Emmys: I thought the show was great. Jimmy Fallon was funny and charming and oh so tan, John Hodgman’s fun facts about the winners were subversive and delightful, and everyone pretty much looked great and nailed their lines. Except for John Krasinski, but we’ll just put the blame on the bad acting stench that is January Jones.

But let’s all agree that the real fun of the Emmys happens afterwards, when our small screened heroes get wasssstieeeeeessssss. That includes the Mad Men crew, who picked up a deserved Emmy for Best Drama. Listen as Kiernan Shipka, aka little Sally Draper, describes what the cast plans to do after the show last night:

View more news videos at: http://www.nbcnewyork.com/video.

She’s going to grow up to be such a Margot Tenenbaum, that one.

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